My Top Ten Songs... Ever

Thought experiments are interesting, because tracking the way our beliefs and opinions change through time is a clear example of how we are never the same people for very long. Biologically, we are entirely new people every seven years or so, but yet our mind and soul carries on unchanged. Or does it? Every experience we have teaches us, and changes us, and sometimes it's worth taking note of that fact, because it's easy to get stuck thinking whatever once was is what must always be. That simply isn't true.

For this thought experiment, I took up perhaps the hardest challenge yet. Listing my twenty favorite albums isn't easy, and picking ten for a desert island can be difficult, but that is nothing compared to trying to pare down an entire life of music listening into just ten songs that are irreplaceable.

This list is a combination of songs that I've listened to the most, loved the most, and been most affected by. They are the songs that serve as the markers showing the path I have been down, and that may have pointed me in directions without being aware of it. I won't try to rank them one-through-ten. Just let it be known they are the first-ballot Hall Of Fame songs in my memory palace.

Blues Traveler - Hook

Does one become a cynic, or was one always a cynic? That seems an odd question to ask when we're talking about an upbeat pop song, but what has kept "Hook" from ever leaving my mind these last thirty years is not just a harmonica solo I put above everything I've ever heard played on a guitar. True story. No, what makes this song an undying echo is that it opened my eyes to cynicism, and did so by proving everything it said was true. It's actually genius if you think about it, and I'm not sure I've ever heard a better example of a 'screw the audience' joke in song.

Dilana - Falling Apart

If anyone ever asks, this is what I say is currently my favorite song. From the very first time I saw a grainy video of it being performed live, there has been something about this song that hit me like nothing else. The combination of my favorite voice in the world, and a message that resonates with someone who often feels broken, is a balm nothing else can quite match. Some songs are like a warm hug when the world has given you the cold shoulder, and that is what this song means to me. We may all be "bloody fucked up", but moments like this let us know we're not alone in feeling that way. If the stereotypical image of Heaven turns out to be real, this is what a certain angel will be playing, at least within earshot of me.

Graham Colton - I Can't Stand Here Waiting

If you ask me what's so great about this song (at least the version I'm talking about - which I believe is still unavailable online), it's hard to figure. It doesn't have a nifty guitar riff, nor is the hook the pop gem that will get sampled over and over by desperate artists. No, this is a case more of honesty, where Graham's vocal as he talks about not being able to wait while the lights fade around him is something that hits me hard, because I feel like my life has been nothing but waiting, only mine is for the lights to come back on. It almost serves as a song warning people about where I am, and maybe that's enough of a rope to climb back up.

Guns N Roses - November Rain

As mentioned, I'm not the biggest fan of guitar solos, despite being a guitar player. The biggest exception to that is this song, where all three of Slash's solos are burned into my memory. This song is the perfect balance of pompous ass-hattery from Axl, and glorious rock coolness from Slash. Neither side would work without the other, and I think what I love is that it showed the formula of the Meat Loaf music I first fell in love with was actually timeless. Like it or not, this was a glam version of that same thing. Obviously, I love it.

Matchbox Twenty - Bent

Returning to that familiar theme, a song about being damaged goods always stands a strong chance of resonating with me. This one came out at a time when I was particularly unsure of myself, as defining who you are is difficult when you are doing it disconnected from anyone who can tell you that you're wrong. This song came out while I was in high school, and perhaps the sad resignation of it is the perfect memory of that chapter of life. It's hard to remove a memory once it's been etched, so turning it into beautiful music is easier.

Meat Loaf - I'd Lie For You (And That's The Truth)

While it's easy to think of Meat Loaf and Jim Steinman as inseparable, the truth of the matter is that my favorite Meat Loaf song was actually written by Diane Warren. Sure, it's a pastiche trying very hard to mine the same territory, but it is an imposter, and yet I have adored this song for nearly thirty years. Maybe it has to do with how often I lie to myself, maybe I find Patti Russo to be the best duet partner Meat ever had, or maybe it's just that the drama hits the slight bit harder without Steinman's penchant for sarcasm and sex jokes. I love the bombast, I love the guitar solo (which I don't get to say often enough), and the false ending is just perfect. The two years between "Bat Out Of Hell II" and this album were just enough where I was old enough to 'get it' more this time. That might still be true.

Meat Loaf - I'd Do Anything For Love (But I Won't Do That)/Jim Steinman - Bad For Good

I am going to cheat here, because I'm not sure how to choose between the song that gave me love for music, and the song that most defines the man I've looked to for inspiration more than anyone else. As I have said countless times, I believe much of my personality was formed around the music written by Jim Steinman, and the enigmatic lyrics of "I'd Do Anything For Love" are a perfect example of that. The self-pity is a part of my core, the blue humor I don't think a lot of people heard at first bubbles under in my own comedy, and the fact he was able to say something important about the character's desires without nearly anyone understanding the truth is a skill I put to use with regularity. That said, Steinman's confession to the rock and roll gods on his solo album is every bit as important, because it is the realization and embrace that we're never going to change. We're going to be who we are, because that's all we can be.

Natalie Imbruglia - Torn

When this song celebrated it's 25th anniversary, I made the controversial statement that it is the sexiest song I have ever heard. Yes, I know how terribly lame that sounds, but it happens to be my truth. Seeing the video play on VH-1, and hearing Natalie's breathy voice sing about being naked on the floor, was a moment of awakening. I didn't know it at the time, but I do now. Great songs give us feelings we can't get from anything else in life, and that's what I take from "Torn". It is a glorious bit of music that wraps up sadness, passion, ennui, and everything else into a package that burrows into my head. It sounds simple when you hear it, until you know how hard it is to strike gold.

Tonic - If You Could Only See

The first time I decided I had a favorite song, it was this one. There was something about the dynamics that caught my ear, and even though my young mind was initially wrong about what the song was trying to tell me, it stuck with me. It ate away at my subconscious, and slowly convinced me that music was more than something I listened to for amusement. Music was more important than that, it was something deeper, it was a part of me. I picked up a guitar to learn to play this song, and I started writing songs to see if I could replicate the magic I felt in this one. Maybe I never got quite there, but any song that changes the trajectory of your life is held close to the heart.

The Wallflowers - One Headlight

I don't like to make the simple picks, but sometimes they are inevitable. While "Bringing Down The Horse" is not my favorite Wallflowers album, nor the one that has influenced me the most, it is "One Headlight" that stands above everything else as the defining song of my relationship with the band. There is something about the slightly ominous tone of the guitars that wraps itself around Jakob Dylan's voice, fitting perfectly with the story of death and hopelessness. It was the details about cheap wine and engines that wouldn't start that pushed lyrics to the forefront of my mind. While the next album was the one that set me on the path of being a writer, I can't deny that "One Headlight" lit the way. And yes, I fully embrace how bad that pun is.