Singles Roundup: Dream Theater & Michael Schenker ft Axl Rose

I hope you didn't want positivity today.

Dream Theater - Night Terror

The big news with Dream Theater is that Mike Portnoy is back in the band. That news has little bearing on this song, except for when it does. I'll explain, but it's a bit complicated. The short version of the story is that this new song is standard fare Dream Theater, so your preconceptions are entirely accurate. There is nothing surprising or new at all, so we don't need to get too far into a discussion of what all of this means for the next chapter of the band's career. The straight line will not bend, or break.

The deeper discussion involves the way we listen to music. I am not someone who listens to drums under most circumstances, so Portnoy's return makes almost no difference to me. He plays like himself, which means it still sounds like Dream Theater. Where I think his impact can be felt is in the way the song is arranged, as that is where he was so often involved. That is also where this song feels like a huge step back from where the band has been in his absence.

The biggest issue this song has is in its construction. There are copious riffs, fills, and solos, but it feels like we have gone back to their self-indulgent worst. Ideas are thrown against the wall with little concern about the narrative through-line. Instrumental parts pile up in between the vocals, playing into the worst stereotypes about prog being music for music nerds. When those vocals do come in, it's in the form of a chorus so melodically simple it doesn't grip me at all.

While it's nice that they haven't recycled their usual formula for a lead single, this song is not inspiring confidence in what the new album is going to be. These ten minutes are Dream Theater at their worst, and there is another hour of material still to come. They had focused their songwriting much more during their time with Mike Mangini, and this song feels like when you return to a familiar place to realize you memories sanitized what was never so great.

Michael Schenker ft Axl Rose - Love To Love

I want to thank Michael Schenker for releasing this song. No, not because it's good, which it isn't. I want to think him for finally making it clear the world is better off without Guns N Roses ever releasing a new album again.

Why? If you listen to this song, it's clear that Axl has no voice left. He sounds absolutely horrific trying to softly coo the verses. There was a time he was described as having 'helium voice', and this version of Axl is that, but with even less power. He sounds broken, tired, and like a shell of who he used to be. The fact that Schenker is re-recording these songs is enough to elicit a groan, but to pick an Axl who can't sing to perform one of UFO's most legendary songs is such a stunning lack of self-awareness. I'm truly baffled.

As I was saying, hearing the current state of Axl's voice makes it clear a new Guns N Roses album would be a complete clusterfuck. There is a good reason the reunited band has only put out songs Axl sang a decade ago. Those are the only recordings they can make sound presentable. Unfortunately, Schenker didn't figure that out until he had already committed to Axl being on his record. As much as we complain about people who stop making new music, there is often a good reason why they do. Axl is one of those people I will not complain about if he decides to retire. In fact, I wouldn't have minded if he did so before recording this song.